Life Lessons
by QUEEN EMPATH
Summary: When Draco starts to show interest in Muggle technology, Lucius decides to give him a life lesson. Written for QLFC round 7


**Life Lessons**

 **Disclaimer-** I don't own the wonderful world of Harry Potter

 **A/N -** written for QLFC round 7

 **Prompt-** Write about a witch or wizard trying to explain to a magical child how (one or more) Muggle technology works.

 **Additional prompts -** (object) microwave, (dialogue) "How many wizards does it take to make an aeroplane fly?" and (dialogue) "You say that again and I'll microwave your brain!"

* * *

It started with an innocent question, so innocent that Lucius didn't see it coming.

"Father, how many wizards does it take to make an aeroplane fly?" asked seven-year-old Draco, his grey/silver eyes huge with astonishment. On cue Lucius choked on his wine.

"W-what did you say?" he asked, not believing his ears.

Draco huffed in annoyance and asked, "how does a Muggle airplane fly?" as if he was talking to a child.

"Where did you even see a Muggle airplane?" Lucius asked, ignoring his son's tone. He was sure it was all Narcissa's fault.

"Remember when we visited that place during Christmas? I saw a huge grey bird flying but it didn't look like a bird, then that boy told me it was an airplane," explained Draco, making no sense whatsoever.

"Wait, what boy? Who are you talking about?" Lucius was panicking now. Had his son talked to some filthy Muggle child; had that child touched his son? Oh Merlin, if the Dark Lord was alive, he would've skinned him alive.

Seeing his father's reaction, Draco groaned. He would have to explain everything to him again.

"The nice farm boy told me about airplanes. He even gave me his wooden horse. But why doesn't it move like the one Blaise has?" Draco asked, pulling the small toy out of his pocket.

Lucius attempted to snatch it, but Draco swatted his hands away. Then an idea came to Lucius's mind. He would use the same method his father used on him years ago. He cleared his throat and spoke.

"That toy doesn't move because it's a Muggle toy, and you shouldn't speak to Muggles or take things from them," he said warily eyeing the toy.

"Why?" asked Draco. He didn't believe his father. That boy had seemed nice.

"Because they're filthy, inferior and very, very dangerous," Lucius said with all seriousness, but Draco just snorted.

"You're lying," he stated.

Lucius cursed under his breath, ' _bloody stubborn Blacks'._

"Do you think I'm lying? Did you know that Muggles use a small box which traps people inside it and those poor people can never get out? What did Muggles call it again? Oh yes, a tee vee. This tee vee traps people inside for all eternity," Lucius said, watching Draco closely. He was very pleased with his child's reaction _—_ a mixture of disbelief and horror.

"B-but mother said that Muggles don't have magic like us. So how do they trap people inside the tee vee?" Draco asked.

Lucius chuckled at his son's reaction; he had raised him well.

"They do it with the help of _Science!"_ he said dramatically

"W-what's science?" Draco asked fearfully.

Lucius flashed his teeth like shark then started to speak. "Science is a very horrible thing, my son. It helps Muggles create dangerous things like the Motorbike. It's a dangerous beast which comes to life when a person rides it. It is capable of harming wizards and witches," Lucius explained. He still remembered Sirius _—_ that blood traitor _—_ using that thing. By now Draco was shivering with fear.

"Can the Motorbike come here?" he asked.

"Oh no, son, it can't. Since we have magical wards, no Muggle thing can harm us," he said then continued. "Do you know what else Muggles do? They kill wizards with a thing called a gun. They love killing people, especially young witches and wizards who can't defend themselves."

Now Draco was clutching his stuffed hippogriff, which was neighing loudly.

"And do you know how they make food? They use a small metallic box called a mic-, mic-, ah, microwave! They cut poor Pygmy Puffs and pixies into pieces and stuff them inside that microwave and watch those poor creatures die…"

"No!" shouted Draco, clapping both hands on his ears so that he couldn't hear what his father was saying.

"Yes son. They only pretend to be sweet and caring. They win your trust by helping you or giving you their toy," Lucius said, eyeing the wooden horse which was thrown on the floor. He smiled as he continued. "Muggles are very vicious and dangerous, more dangerous than vampires and werewolves. As you know, the great Merlin was friends with that filthy _Muggle king._ During those days, Muggles used to burn wizards alive just because they were different than them.

"That's why I want you to stay away from that boy and every other Muggle. At first, they all pretend to be nice, but once when they find out that you're a wizard, they'll kill you," Lucius finished and tried to hand his son the wooden horse.

"Keep it away, I don't want to see it ever again! I hate, I hate Muggles, everything about them!" Draco shouted, throwing the wooden horse across the room.

Lucius mentally patted himself on the back. He was so pleased with his son's response. He patted Draco's head and bid him goodnight.

* * *

When Lucius entered his bedroom Narcissa was waiting for him. His wife looked confused to see her husband's smug look.

"What are you so happy about?" she asked.

Lucius smiled charmingly.

"Just prevented our son from ruining his life," he said proudly.

"Huh?"

"I just told Draco how dangerous and scary are Muggles are," he explained.

At this Narcissa just snorted.

"Yeah right, Muggles aren't scary, they're just inferior," she said.

Lucius pretended to look offended. He couldn't believe his own wife was making fun of him.

"But they are scaryyyy," he said dramatically.

"You say that again and I'll microwave your brain!" Narcissa threatened. With that, she climbed into bed and went to sleep leaving Lucius open mouthed.


End file.
